A change in the air

I have found myself feeling different these past few days, I am laughing and dancing and goofing around in a way I normally wouldn’t. Sarah has even mentioned my randomness and many have told me I need to drink less energy potions. But I know its because I finally feel happy again, fully gleefully happy! The dark days are for now behind me and I am actually smiling a lot. This is very much because of my friends, I spent a week in Tartarus with Zachery and Erik and when I came back I felt different. Then I have been spending time with Cody who constantly makes me laugh like an idiot! Then as usual Sarah and Anna have been the greatest, and with all of this together It helped. I am looking at the world in a different way, but it isn’t scary its peaceful. I don’t fall asleep with tears in my eyes, and I wake up optimistic of the day ahead.

I find myself creating magic again also, something I haven’t done in a very long time. I feel the change in the air, and it is clean and fresh! Looking ahead things may be bumpy but it will be full of laughter and friends! I cant ask for anything else!

More to come,

Ruby the not so Wicked Witch

When a friend is the best magic

So I am back in Tartarus, attempting to figure out some of the things in my life that have been troubling me. I haven’t talked much about the true issues in my life and have opted to discuss less troubling matters such as Cody and Cam as it makes it easier to write. I wish  I could truly explain the issues in my life as of recent but I myself have no clue as to what words could adequately describe my emotional state. So I am happy to report I am back with Erik and Zachery and hopefully one of them will have wise words to help me figure out my life. If not I know they will help me at least in the way of distraction as they are always there to make me laugh and smile, no matter what else is going on in my life!

I think I have had a change in attitude these past few days just because I knew I would be back with them! As well as because I have to report about Cody and Cam, I need the two most important men in my life to approve those I am possibly crushing on. They also need to help me figure out how delusional Sarah is in her assumption that they like me! But I am mostly excited for a day of adventure we have decided to embark on. The goal is to get 20 things off a checklist of “bucket list” items! These things involve us roaming around Tartarus and having some great laughs!

Well I suppose I should get back to reality instead of just writing about it!

More to come,

Ruby  the not so Wicked witch

Valentines Day

It is the time of the year when fairytale creatures of all variety feel the pull of love or the pull of loneliness. Some lose their battles and become consumed with one of them, others fight and win. I would like to think I am winning this battle, as I am not consumed with love (lust maybe) or loneliness! I know plenty that are fully consumed with the ideas brought up on valentines, while I know others who like me have no real commitment to the holiday. I know that I might be a hypocrite when my other posts about Cody and Cam are brought into light, but I am not really lonely, or looking for love. I am spending this day studying for an exam in a class were we look at the social behaviour of creatures, then tonight I am going to a movie with Sarah… and Cody. But with Sarah there it cannot be anything more than a group of friends seeing a bad movie together. It won’t be a day where I fantasize about a “prince charming” especially as I do not ever want to date a prince charming but that in itself is a whole other rant. It will be a day I spend with the people that don’t make me lonely, a day I spend with those who make me laugh and smile! I suggest you all spend this day the same way, even if you are single there is someone around who cares about you!

Optimistically ,

Ruby the not so Wicked Witch

Concentration issues

I really need to find a way to concentrate, but every time I try I end up getting lost in thought or distracted by a friend within minutes! It not even anything specific, I am not lost in a day dream about a guy, or scrolling on spellbook! I am just stuck in my own head, wishing there was more I could do but knowing I will not truly get to concentrate on what I need to. I shouldn’t be writing a post, I should be studying for one of the numerous exams I have. Especially because I have plans tomorrow and leave for Tartarus on Friday.

I find myself sitting in my schools gigantic library full of knowledge and students studying away, focus to all extents and there I am lost. I know what I need to do, and how to start, but not how to focus my attention on it. I really need to study now as I know I won’t be able to later as Cody is joining me and Sarah later on this evening to study, and for whatever reason I seem to get nothing done around him as we keep talking. If only I had a wizard near by to conjure up a spell to help with my concentration. I was even thinking about going to the potions shop for something, but I doubt I need more energy and have no clue as to what they have that could help me study. Hopefully I can get past this sooner than later!

More to come,

Ruby the not so Wicked Witch

Notice: In need of a mind reader

“mind reader” aka a person who can supposedly discern what another person is thinking. (as a google search has told me)
Does anyone know of such a person, cause I could use some help! I am in a constant state of confusion when it comes to Cody and Cam! Sarah and Anna both seem to think these men like me, but I am at a loss. I normally have a knack for picking up on subtle cues about people but not with these guys. These guys are making me question all I know, and it is driving me insane. I have been content with the idea that I could never find someone who could change my world as fairytales and books describe. I would not find that mysterious person who has me question my world, and flip it around all at the same time! A person who would give me butterflies when he speaks to me, a person who can say the right thing to calm my anxiety without me openly saying I am freaking out.
I was content and then out of no where I find two guys who fit this description. At first I was angry and now I am just in a state of constant confusion. The moment I think my feelings for one have left, I see them and they say the right thing, the thing that makes my heart jump if only a little. I have to admit I know my feelings are not as intense and described they are only minuscule compared to others when they get these feelings, but the fact I have any makes me feel out of balance. I just want to know how to continue, actually need is a better word. I need advice, even a simple “this is normal” so I can find balance in this new world I have come to be placed within.
So for all who stumble upon this blog please give me advice, what should I do?
More to come,
The not so Wicked Witch

Birthday celebration Part 2

The night at the Tavern!

So for my twentieth birthday a group of friends (and my parents) went to a tavern in Camelot and celebrated. It was a great night full of fun and laughter. I was originally nervous (as discussed in an earlier post) but It turned into a great night! We were at the tavern for a few hours and then ended up at Vicky’s place. Sarah and Anna convinced me to take a muff dive in front of my parents. Scott created a fun mysterious atmosphere by trying to tell everyone he was dating Vicky. She did not quite enjoy that as much as I did. I got bought numerous drinks and shots that night, even by my parents. A group of us even ended up back at Vicky’s until four in the morning. Sarah and Cody ended up crashing at my place, much to madras’s annoyance in the morning. It was honestly one of the most fun evenings I have had in a long time. I was actually quite surprised by Cody that evening, from him coming in the first place to him staying all night. Scott is practically involve with him and Sarah literally wanted to date him, well until she found out I like him. It was a great night, even though the next morning I was not feeling as great. I can now say I had a birthday celebration that did not make me want to cringe at remembering! My parents even got me flowers!

I am just hoping this next year is filled with the same laughter and happy memories that my birthday was!

More to come,

The not so wicked witch

When Your thoughts are consumed

I am so confused and frustrated. I don’t know what is happening to me, I cannot seem to concentrate on anything I need to. My thoughts are consumed with feelings, and I am at a loss. I can barely think of the words to describe my situation now; all I know is that I have caught myself behaving differently than I normally do around these two guys. Sarah thinks I am crushing on both of these guys, but I don’t normally do that. I get intrigued by people I don’t understand and then once I do learn about them I get over it, not with these guys. The more I hang out with Cody the more intrigued I get, and the worst but best part is he actually has the ability to surprise me… It is annoying. And then there is Cam, and I barely know anything about him except I find myself excited when I see him and talk to him. There is the running theory that this is because when I see him he is working at the potions shop and I am getting my favourite drink, but I don’t think that is it. If I see him as I am walking by I feel weird. This is abnormal and annoying. I think the only person who is happy about this is Sarah because she finds it funny that I cannot figure these guys out and its causing me to act out of character.

Honestly I am having such a difficult time figuring them out that I couldn’t even write about their character as I don’t know it.  Which is good because of the fact that if I was to like a person I would want them to be someone fascinating and someone that I can be surprised by, but those traits also make me so frustrated. I cannot even describe the frustration I am feeling, some of it comes from the situation with them and some comes from the fact that I have noticed myself behaving in ways that I don’t understand. For example, I have been fumbling on things I shouldn’t (in front of a class even), talking a lot more than normal (which in my case is a very very large amount)! Trust me it is an intense amount of weirdness that I do not understand in any way. I know that anyone reading this will probably be sitting there thinking “its obvious you like someone, don’t make a big deal out of it!” well for me that is a big deal. I don’t have emotions like this, honestly I don’t care enough to have emotions like this. So I feel like I have the right to be this confused and frustrated.

 

Wish me luck,

The not so wicked witch